Monday, October 14, 2013

Anxiety

I made it almost a year off of medication without a major anxiety episode. And if you had asked me about how I was doing with respect to anxiety two weeks ago, as my friend Don happened to do, I would have also told you that I was doing great and glad that it was almost a year without an issue and without medication. Life is good. And it is. However, last week I had a significant anxiety episode and it messed me up for days. I feel like I am just now coming around to normal. Anyway, I don't really want to write about it all today, I just want to make this note as a place holder for the record. Hopefully I'll come back to this a little later. One result is that I decided to try medication again. Now I am trying a different SSRI anxiety medication than I was a year ago with the thought that perhaps the side effects will be non existent, less, or tolerably different. We shall see. I am still in the beginning of gradually building up to a full dose. The interesting thing is that this anxiety and panic occurred despite the fact that I was having such great days just before. Despite the fact that I was having so much time in the days before to play with my kids and to do the things that I enjoy. I can't say I fully understand anxiety or panic attacks or my body. Anyway, I am currently feeling all right and and grateful for all that I have going for me including my family. I did have to stay home from work one day and I wisely watched/listened to two great movies and in one of them, Away We Go, there is the this beautiful and sweet song called Wait by Alexi Murdoch. I hope you enjoy.