Ana is so adorably kissable. Her cheeks just get more kissable each day. She crawls. Watching her crawl is exciting. And after only a few days of crawling experience, she is now holding on to legs and surfaces and then rising up on her knees. Or, she will stand on her feet causing her butt to go in the air. I realized it's only a matter of time before she is standing with support and then walking along the walls of the room while holding on. I think about how she is almost 6 months old and I think about Enzo. At 6 months and one day he ate his first solid food, avocado, and then 4 months later he was walking. It all just happens. This is not an incredibly wide window in time to enjoy this stage of my Ana's life. My little girl, like my little boy, will only be in this stage for a limited time. It's not a happy or sad causer but it is a wake up reminder for me to stay aware and appreciate these moments.
Ana smiles when I come home and she sees me. My heart gets gooey. I can't kiss her enough.
Enzo just keeps growing up. He picks up words fast. We read every night now. I know I could have started that earlier but I just started this month. It was time. He loves it. He picked up on the routine after just two days. He picks a book, we put it on the upper edge of his bed, we both lie on our bellies at which point Enzo tends to let out a laugh of excitement, and we read together. I read most of the words and Enzo reads most of the pictures pointing and naming "caballo", "rana." Then we finish, Enzo says "more?", I say "tiempo para mi-mis" and I turn out the lights. Then we do our version of chatting about Enzo's day where I ask questions and make assumptions until he gets tired. Sometimes we say good night or bye bye to everyone and every thing we can think of in the dark. Eventually, Enzo drifts off to sleep.
A couple of nights ago Enzo was particularly playful and kept cuddling me or grabbing my fingers and playing with them and the contact was so sweet. I can still feel his fingers and palms wrapped around my fingers. His were silky soft, freshly showered. Being cuddled by my son is one of my favorite events. And we talked. I talked standard English. My son painted more creative audible images punctuated with known words, English and Spanish. Eventually he did go to sleep. And I loved the entire process. Taking Enzo to bed, reading and laying with him until he falls asleep; these are some of the priceless moments we share.
Sometimes, in the morning before I go to work, Enzo will want me to pick him up and then he holds on tightly to me and snuggles in. It makes it so hard to leave but I love the feeling of being close to him and knowing that he wants to be close to me.
Last night, Enzo was in bed with his Mama. Ana was wide awake and we were playing. And I was falling in love with her even more. And I thought, wow, if Enzo didn't exist then this little girl would be the only most beautiful child in my world, my most special treasure. I just sat with this thought. I allowed myself to feel as if Ana was our only child. She is awesome, enriching, fulfilling. And then I thought, that is just how I felt about Enzo before Ana joined us. They are each individually so great at causing me to love more and appreciate more. I love Ana. She is a beautiful gorgeous human. She is a special and rare creature even if there are nearly 7 billion of us humans on Earth now. I love Enzo. He is a beautiful gorgeous human; special and rare even in the masses. I would not want a life in which I did not know these kids. I would not want even a perfectly happy life that did not include both of these jewels. Each of these children is that completely and wholly beautiful. Each is that beautiful individually, that I would consider them each my greatest treasures, my greatest loves. Wow. And I have two so specially magnificent and perfect gems to love and adore.